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July 29, 2007


Linda Stevens

Wow, are you in the wrong profession!


As a client who dissociated in session, couldn't remember any trauma and always felt like a burden to my psychologist (despite being told I wasn't) reading this post makes me feel bad. I had to stop going because my deductible starts over with the new year. Maybe I misread the post, but it seems sort of bitter.

Robin Shapiro

Dear Bill,


Im so sorry you feel bad. I wasnt feeling bitter when I wrote this. I was trying to convey that people who took a long time to get where they are, can take a long time to heal. And that therapists and clients need realistic expectations about the duration of therapy. And that if the therapist has the right skills, and the fit is good, developmental deficits and trauma can be healed. It can be hard on the client and sometimes hard on the therapist, but the payoff is magnificent. I choose hanging in there because I love the work and love the clients and love the outcome. I imagine that your therapist feels the same way.


Good luck to you in your healing,





I found this relatively old post and really liked it. For me it didn´t give any impression of bitterness or wrong profession. On the contrary!

I found myself in the category "Horrible attacment, relatively light trauma" and the text describes me quite adequately. Because English is not my mother tongue, I had to check the word "hunker" in the dictionary, and I actually loughed out loud - it´s the perfect term for my position. My therapy has been a very long (and still ongoing) battle in which issues of attachment, fear of it and fear of losing it are central and almost unbearable. I know it has been hard for my therapist as well, and perhaps that is why I found this post so heartwarming. For me, it has been very therapeutic indeed to go through mutual frustration and see it get resolved. Like many patients with attachment issues I have a history of numerous unsuccessfull therapy attempts, and I really believe that this one has been the successfull one because the therapist is so open and honest with her own feelings. She doesn´t try to hide her frustration and irritation when becoming the innocent victim of my "slapping" as it was called in the post. And she agrees to be there and patiently wait while I de-hunker and search for the baby I abhor and fear. And despite the frustration and irritation she actually gives the impression that she really likes me and likes working with me. That, for me, is as healing as it gets.

So, for me this was a hilarious and therapeutic post. I learned some new English words and felt understood and respected by proxy. Thanks for that.

Thomas A

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